When Yards Attack

The other week, during the first break in our horribly hot weather, i decided to do some much needed yard work...
I like having a wildish yard..but this Boo Radley thing that's going on now is a bit too much.
I expect to find monkeys, or some other wild critter, swinging thru the trees one of these days..
Anyway..in the course of an hour i sustained several yard injuries...stepped on a big Bouganvilla thorn, which had me hopping and hobbling around...then had a stray twig, stick really, shoot into my ear while i was cutting back some hedges...obviously the yard did not want to be worked on that day...
and believe me being poked in the ear with a stick is no fun..
So while i have experienced a few problems with that ear ..it was not that big of a deal....Now, it seems i have a splinter inside my ear from that encounter...How am i to explain that to the doctor??? My yard attacked me..Doc.